Confessions and Changes
I’ve spent a lot of time floundering. I’ve been entrapped by so much fear of failure- which creates a cycle of more failure. I’m sick and tired of being in this downward spiral.
I’ve been declining in mental stability, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and financially. I don’t even know how long I’ve been in this state. It’s been several months if not years. The scary thing is that it was so gradual that it’s hard to see the changes. I hate being in this state. I want to make a positive difference with God in this world. But, Satan and my sinful nature have gotten me so confused and lazy that I haven’t done much.
Due to my fear of failure I resort to the following crutches: playing 3-6 hours of Starcraft, watching 2-3 hours of anime, watching movies, meaninglessly surfing the web, and filling up the holes in my time with more irrelevant activities.
I’ve made a lot of changes in the past few days. I’m not sure where the strength to change comes. It might be from: listening to Anthony Robbins, the midweek lesson about maturity, or a setting in humans that snaps us back awake. I’m going to change- that’s final and hopefully for the better. If I fail- I’m going to fail spectacularly and hopefully learn from those mistakes.
I don’t want to go into more details, because it’s depressing. However, I will share the positive changes that I will be doing.
I promise myself to have a daily quiet time and writing time. My relationship with my God is the most important aspect in my life. My spirituality must be in sync with my creator. It’s really important to me and not in a religious sort of way. For me to do great things I truly believe I need to be in the will of God. If this doesn’t exist I don’t really see a clear reason to live. Therefore, for my mental and spiritual stability this must be a priority daily.
I promise myself to exercise three times a week and challenge my body. My body is the best leverage that I have. My body is a physical temple of God. If my body is not in peak performance it affects the rest of life. I’m going to wake up earlier, eat healthier, and exercise. This is to create more energy and passion in my life. I need this to be optimized for me to do the greater.
I promise myself to do work that actually creates a real business. I must succeed in business. This will destroy the roadblocks in my mind and in the real world that limits the positive impacts. I want to help create life-changing environments, services, and products for people. The company will be an overabundance of love, hope, and joy for everyone, from the board of directors, shareholders, employers, employees, and customers. This will be my primary vehicle in my life- to do business with integrity and a manner worthy of glorifying God and his kingdom.
I know I’ve made goals like this many times before, but this time it must be different. I’m only going to take one step at a time and I have more details in my notebook. I’d rather not share the boring details with anyone who reads this.
Thanks for reading and if you follow you’re going to be seeing positive changes.
Be Loving,
Hoo Kang
Photo: 416style
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Hey Hoo,
Praise God
Your message is so powerful and so true.. we must begin and end with God as our focus and put Him first in everything that we do..
He provides all strength and courage. It’s amazing how powerful prayer is for the soul. I’m so happy to hear that you are using your business to glorify God.
I pray for peace and joy to come upon you and give you rest and comfort.
Blessings,
Josh